The Gift Of Resistance

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When the floodgates of understanding open before you, step into the flow, and embrace it.

That was my very huge and gifted lesson to myself this morning. I have been feeling some very deep understandings were just below the surface of my subconscious lately, but for the life of me, I couldn’t seem to be able to retrieve them. Most mornings I check out the WordPress blogs that I follow, and lo and behold there was the key to unlocking the understandings that I was seeking.

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I began reading Judith  Dagley Flaherty’s latest posting “Resistance Decoded! Compassion Required”. In this particular post, she puts a question out there for all of us to honestly ask ourselves…”why would I feel such resistance to creating a new experience that I feel so powerfully pulled to create, anyway?”  I swear that I could almost hear the lock within my subconscious click open as the key within that question hit it’s mark. That wise, loving, and very endearing voice from within began to speak with such clarity and honesty, and the deepest of understandings were revealed.

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Sometimes I wish that I could record my own thoughts, so that I could remember these delicious revelations in detail. However, I will do the best I can. It was explained to me that my biggest resistance at this point is claiming my own power. I have abused my power in various forms and situations in the history of my soul’s journey. I have much remorse in that area, and some fears linger that I may do it again. However, I was told that I chose the events of my childhood, in order to prevent the abuse of power from ever repeating  in this lifetime. As a preventative of sorts, I arranged to have various relatives bully and abuse me during my childhood years, and on several levels, physically, mentally and emotionally. I felt that this would leave enough of an impression on my soul, that the lessons of this would remain with me throughout my life’s journey. I have been assured that this has indeed played out just the way that I intended, and that an inner compassion for all others is the result. It was also revealed to me that I have increased the vibration of love and light within me to the point of no return, and that I need not fear that I will fall to the level of abusing my power under any circumstance. I was simply told to let the fear of that fall away…”let it go”. I awoke this morning, feeling as if I had been gutted like a fish, and my intestines had been scraped clean of all debris…and a lot of fear. I suppose this is what I was working on last night in my sleep, in preparation for this morning. Ahhh, the synchronicity of it all!

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Ambassador Of Light

I usually receive very specific guidance about every topic and experience that I share. But, for the past 2 months, things have been very different! I feel like a new person everyday, with new perspectives, and a more expanded outlook of both myself and the world around me.

It feels to me like I am walking on shifting sands. I leave no physical imprint within the sand, but droplets of liquid light are left behind for others to pick up and use as their own. As my foot leaves the ground, the ground that was beneath it disappears, leaving my past behind as well. Only the now moment matters. The ground that is to be under my next step does not appear until I have put forth the effort, and most importantly, the trust, trusting that the ground will indeed appear. It feels rather strange, maybe crazy is a better word, to have so much trust put into thought and action, when I don’t really have a clue where I am heading. All I do know is that it is a very loving and peaceful place to be for me.

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As I was contemplating a title for this sharing, my higher self shared “ambassador, that is the word that you are looking for”. Hmmm…ambassador…(of course I just had to look it up to make sure that I fully understood the meaning intended)…an accredited diplomat sent by a foreign country as it’s official representative. It never fails to amaze me when I am given the perfect word to use, ( and often I don’t even know it’s true meaning). That is the proof to me that the ideas and knowledge come from a “higher” place and understanding. I have known for decades that I originate from somewhere light years away. I am here on a mission that I volunteered for, as an ambassador of light. I still have human desires, needs, and experiences, but they seem to pale in comparison to my activities as an ambassador. Instead of waiting for the “big mission” to be revealed to me, I sense that it is more about the smaller assignments that are given to me as the need arises. It is about being aware of where, what, when, how and who, and the inner guidance related to it. It is often just about a loving, kind and uplifting word to someone who needs it, and I have found that a warm and sincere smile can move mountains. It’s not only my human family that I interact with in this way, but also the animals. The 2 dogs and the cat in our home follow me around like I am the Pied Piper, or something like that. I love their company, but I can’t even begin to count how many times I have turned around and almost tripped over one of them. So, I accept my 3 shadows willingly and lovingly. Even the birds and animals outside don’t seem to fly or scurry away from me like they used to before. They seemingly know that I am their caretaker/ambassador too. I love nothing more than to watch the multitude of feathered friends flock to our just-filled bird feeders, along with the squirrels, bunnies and “Chippy”, our friendly neighbourhood chipmunk. They are just too adorable for words!

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I sense that the universe has something up it’s sleeve for me, and I don’t feel that it is as simple as pulling a rabbit out of a hat. It’s big, no…huge! I sense a major physical move to another place in my near future, but until then I am taking one little step at a time, in faith and trust. I am sure that my 3 loving little shadows will be close behind.