When the floodgates of understanding open before you, step into the flow, and embrace it.
That was my very huge and gifted lesson to myself this morning. I have been feeling some very deep understandings were just below the surface of my subconscious lately, but for the life of me, I couldn’t seem to be able to retrieve them. Most mornings I check out the WordPress blogs that I follow, and lo and behold there was the key to unlocking the understandings that I was seeking.
I began reading Judith Dagley Flaherty’s latest posting “Resistance Decoded! Compassion Required”. In this particular post, she puts a question out there for all of us to honestly ask ourselves…”why would I feel such resistance to creating a new experience that I feel so powerfully pulled to create, anyway?” I swear that I could almost hear the lock within my subconscious click open as the key within that question hit it’s mark. That wise, loving, and very endearing voice from within began to speak with such clarity and honesty, and the deepest of understandings were revealed.
Sometimes I wish that I could record my own thoughts, so that I could remember these delicious revelations in detail. However, I will do the best I can. It was explained to me that my biggest resistance at this point is claiming my own power. I have abused my power in various forms and situations in the history of my soul’s journey. I have much remorse in that area, and some fears linger that I may do it again. However, I was told that I chose the events of my childhood, in order to prevent the abuse of power from ever repeating in this lifetime. As a preventative of sorts, I arranged to have various relatives bully and abuse me during my childhood years, and on several levels, physically, mentally and emotionally. I felt that this would leave enough of an impression on my soul, that the lessons of this would remain with me throughout my life’s journey. I have been assured that this has indeed played out just the way that I intended, and that an inner compassion for all others is the result. It was also revealed to me that I have increased the vibration of love and light within me to the point of no return, and that I need not fear that I will fall to the level of abusing my power under any circumstance. I was simply told to let the fear of that fall away…”let it go”. I awoke this morning, feeling as if I had been gutted like a fish, and my intestines had been scraped clean of all debris…and a lot of fear. I suppose this is what I was working on last night in my sleep, in preparation for this morning. Ahhh, the synchronicity of it all!